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Russian Women Detailed Facts
(When we refer to Russian women we are including Ukrainian and other women from the countries of the former Soviet Union. But to try and keep things simple we will refer to these ladies as ‘Russian women’).
Introduction to Russian women
OK, so you like the idea of finding a beautiful Russian lady. Why not? Many men have done so and thoroughly recommend it!
But there is absolutely no doubt that it will help if you learnt a little about their culture, traditions, and some differences in their behavior to Western women.
Putting it simply, Russian Women think in a different way. Their dreams, their aspirations and motives can be very different to those of Western women.
We will try and avoid certain stereotypes concerning Russians in general and Russian Women in particular. In fact, many of these stereotypes are far from reality, but there are characteristics and life values of a Russian Woman that are different.
So let's try to understand Russian Women, while keeping in mind that every person is unique in themselves.
Why Russian women?
It is commonly considered that a Slavic Woman can become a perfect wife. This means being loving and tender to their husbands,kind and caring mothers to the children and good housekeepers in the home. When a husband comes home in the evening he finds his house clean, the food prepared for him and a beautiful loving woman playing with children. Isn't it a dream?
Its not only a dream for western men but also for Russian women as well. Many western women have become more oriented on their careers and Russian men have lost some degree of certainty in their ability to provide for the future family due to the difficult economic situation. Women are also hesitant about taking such a serious step as creating a family, as they often feel insecure in the possibility of not being able to provide for their children with a good education, healthcare and suitable living conditions. Housing can be a huge problem for a young family in Russia and other countries of Former Soviet Union.
So it's natural that the interest of western men to Russian women has greatly increased during the last few years. And those men that choose to look for a wife in Russia get very lucky because they manage to win the heart of young beautiful slim trendy and well-educated Russian brides that are dreaming of security, stability, a happy family life and good future for their children.
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Russian Women and Beauty
On average, young Russian women are slimmer than their western counterparts. Russian women are used to preparing food at home; they have not become the victims of the fast food. In addition to this the most of Russian women make use of public transport and walk a lot.
In spite of the comparatively low salaries Russian women spend a lot of money on expensive make-up and clothes. Many of them keep to a diet or go in for sports to stay in great shape. They do so not only to win the hearts and catch admiring glances of men, they think that keeping up with the latest trends in fashion magazines, television and advertising is absolutely necessary to be "compatible" with their female friends. But they have also realized the importance of leading a healthy life-style and having a up to date, modern and trendy appearance. It is considered that a girl who knows how to dress up and attend herself has a lot more chances to get married.
Many of them have also learnt how to sew or knit from the very childhood because these skills are thought to be of a great demand if one wants to dress up at minimum expenses. As a result, many Russian women will also make their own clothes. However, a Russian woman’s ability to sew or to cook is not considered enough for a successful marriage.
Russian women and fashion
When you meet a Russian lady you may be quite amazed when first being out with her whether for a special occasion, dinner, or just a movie, in the way they are dress up.
They pay a lot more attention to looks and clothes than European or American women. It is very unlikely that you see many Russian women wearing shapeless T-shirts or baggy jeans.
In many cities it is not unnatural to see many women wearing high heels and make up and perfumes during the daytime just going to or from work. It is also absolutely normal to wear tight clothes and mini skirts, especially in the summer. Do not let this mislead you, as too short a skirt and too bright a top can hide an ordinary girl who will feel harassed if you start inviting her to your hotel room out of the blue!
The clothes are a part of image and sexuality of a Russian woman, and means of attraction. They are rather demanding in the way they wish to look. Even if the outfit is not the trendiest, tidiness and elegance are always absolute requirements for Russian women.
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Russian Women and Education
Thanks to the socialistic times when education was free of charge and available for everyone, many people in Russia and other countries have a higher education, and this is especially true with women. Good higher education is also very important for a young girl even if she is not planning to work just after the graduation from the University but wants to dedicate herself to the future family and children.
Russian Women and Profession
Some of the professions stated in the girls' profiles can seem quite impressive or sometimes even really misleading. That's why we would like to draw your attention to the very large differences in the salaries and income. The level of prestige and duties performed by the people of the same profession in different countries can differ from the West. For example, a Russian doctor can have excellent medical qualifications and receive a small salary. Equally, there is little possibility for a Russian doctor to become a doctor in the US or elsewhere. An economist in Russia is also not the same as in the West. More often it's a clerk performing duties similar to those of an accountant. Similarly an Accountant may just mean a filing clerk in a finance department. Most of women, interested in marriage with a foreign partner, are ready to change their profession or even stay at home, dedicating themselves to the family, husband, children and of course finding time for herself.
Russian Women and careers
According to the statistics the majority of women in Russia have work. Sometimes women even happen to be breadwinners. But if we dig deeper into this, we see that the reasons we find that most women in Russia work is not so much for their career but rather due to the fact that they have to work as they need the money. Finances in Russian families (especially with children) are often so touch-and-go even if both partners are working that some women do not even use all the unpaid maternity leave to which they are legally entitled because their families cannot afford to live on the husband's salary alone.
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Russian Women and money
A Russian woman’s attitude to money may seem unusual to you. A lot of western men are afraid of scammers and that fear can create serious problems in communicating with Russian women. If you really like a girl you shouldn't be afraid to seem too romantic. Send her flowers, candies or presents to show your affection. Of course words are important, but your deeds or actions are without doubt the best token of your feelings.
At the same time we recommend to avoid sending money directly to ladies (especially if you have never met), even if the reason seems reasonable enough (illness, visa, travel expenses, internet expenses, small salary etc).
But don't be shocked if she expects you to pay for her at the restaurant, theatre or for a taxi. Paying for a Russian woman on a date is the normal way of doing things and is typical of courteous behavior. Russian women expect it from a man and there aren't any "ulterior motives". It's a typical dating rule in Russia. If you don't want to pay for her at a restaurant or you don't want to pay for your correspondence, she will never believe that your intentions are serious. If a woman doesn't allow you to pay for her meal or other expenses, most likely she is not ready for a serious relationship yet and doesn't want to feel obligated towards you. For instance don't be surprised when your girlfriend orders a big portion of ice-cream but doesn't eat it even to a half. Big portion brings more pleasure but the girl can't eat a lot because she wants to stay in a good shape. Such a girl DOES NOT blow off your money, she just tries to enjoy the time spent with you
And there is one more thing that you should know about money and Russian women. Russian women are accustomed to be the binding force in the family and in most families the women take almost complete responsibility for managing the household income (probably because practically all the money is spent on food, clothes and home expenses), that's why Russian husbands give their salary to their wives as the matter of course. Don’t let this confuse or shock you. It can be different in your family of course.
Unfortunately the constant lack of adequate finances and frequent economical crises haven't taught Russian women to plan a budget. And sometimes when there is money it is often spent in quite hastily under the influence of a moment or perhaps urgent needs. This is one of the most frequent reasons for misunderstanding in international families. It is best to find a happy medium in order in this regard. At the same time you mustn't seem too greedy and keep everything to your self or seem as though you are unable to enjoy life.
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Russian women and courting
Gentlemanly behavior, attention and courtesy are the qualities that are shown in a well-bred man showing he is different from others. It is natural and courteous for a man in Russia to help a woman get off a bus or open a door in front of her or help her with the overcoat, and he does not necessarily have to be dating her to do this!
In Russia you're expected to treat a woman like a lady. An expression "to win a woman" would make perfect sense to describe your attitude to a Russian woman when you are courting. She is waiting for your initiative, ability to take up decisions and wants to feel desired and fought for.
Russian women and religion
The majority of the population in Russia are Orthodox in their religious beliefs. This is a traditional branch of Christianity. However, this knowledge can be also quite misleading. Most of the women from former the Soviet states are much less religious than the ones from America or Western Europe. Even if they call themselves Christians, this can mean only that they were baptized in childhood and that they celebrate religious holidays such as Easter or Christmas. Some of them will visit church occasionally (may be on feast days) but the majority will avoid this. Most likely it is a result of upbringing in the Soviet Society. But such a cool attitude to religious traditions doesn't mean that women from Russia are atheists. Almost all of them will believe in the existence of a divine power. But their faith often is a mix of orthodox and pagan ideas. As well as in God they may believe in witches, witchcraft, and fortune telling etc. But the interest in religion has recently grown. In the countries that are close to Europe especially where Catholic Church plays an important role even young people are becoming more religious. If the question of religion is really important to you, we recommend discussing this issue with each lady, you are interested in.
Russian women and Age
This chapter is closely connected with age difference issue. The phenomenon of ageing and attitude to it is different here. Russians tend to grow up faster then Europeans and Americans. This has more to do with self- perception then looks. These days, we tend to focus on careers or business, getting a property, and then get married, have children, and start thinking about career. In Russia, most people are married before the age of 25 and will have kids by the age of 30. However they can continue living with their parents. The latter is influenced by the factor of poor economy in these countries. Russian women start thinking about marriage and having their own family much earlier and appear to be more mature in many life situations than the girl of the same age in your country. So do not be surprised if a 23-year-old girl tells you things you would expect to hear from a lady that is 10 years older.
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Age Difference
Another subject that can cause argument is that of age difference. We can't say that all the Russian women and girls share the same attitude to the difference in age with their future husband. But there are a lot of young beauties, trying to find a tower of strength, a husband, able to provide a standard of living, education to future children and who could be a bread-winner in case of need (not all the women can find an appropriate job without foreign language knowledge and without the experience of living in a foreign country). Many men "from West" that are above 40 match this ideal perfectly. Nevertheless it's not advisable to waste your time on correspondence with girls who are 20+ years younger than you. Most likely she will be interested in the beginning but than she will probably realize that you have too little in common. But if you're ready to keep on trying than you've got a chance to make things work. But isn't it better to find a woman who is a bit older but looks no worse than a young student but who's got life experience and rich inner world and who will sincerely cherish your relationships.
Russian women and sex
During the Soviet time sex, speaking up about it, admitting your sexual desires, needs and problems was a taboo. Things are different now and people feel more relaxed dealing with the issues of sex, especially younger generations.
However, the past times have affected the mentality and you should be prepared that your Russian girlfriend might appear less liberated speaking about sex. Russian women are sexy. They can just be more private when it comes to discussing sexual related matters.
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Dating a Russian woman
Internet dating itself is different from that in usual life, but dating a person from another country, with different a life style, mentality, culture is a lot more different and requires patience, understanding, flexibility and tolerance.
There may be various reasons why you are searching for a partner in a CIS country, and indeed why Russian women are looking for a husband abroad. It could be classified as a combination of cultural, economic, political, personal factors greatly influenced by mass culture and mass media. Anyway in each case the reasons will be different and some standards can appear to be incorrect.
Based on our experience we would like to give some pieces of advice to those who started this endeavor and help them foresee the factors and analyze risks they might have not considered from the start. Internet pages are full of sad and happy stories about international marriages, and we wish your personal story and your life with your loving Russian wife to be happy.
The 1st thing you should do is to analyze your expectations. What do you expect from a woman, your partner, a Russian woman in particular? One of the main reasons for a unhappy marriage between a western man and a Russian woman can be the discrepancy of the Russian women's expectations and desires and hopes of a western man. It is not a secret that there is a widespread opinion among Russian women that life abroad is easy and beautiful and all men are wealthy, kind and matches the description of Mr. Right. In their turn men tend to think that all Russian ladies are home bodies, dependent on husbands and live in extreme poverty, so that life in a developed country will look like a paradise for them. It would be hard to blame anyone for this as mass media and propaganda affect the opinions and people seldom search for alternative information.
When you browse the profiles the 1st thing that makes a great impression is the outstanding beauty of the women in the pictures. The truth is that they really are beautiful.. We have a certain policy that no photos are edited in order to improve a woman's appearance. But you should also take into consideration that before a photo session a woman puts on her make up and is dressed up to look her best. It is hardly possible to look that glamorous in every day life. It is said not to diminish the beauty of Russian women as it is in fact outstanding due to the great mix of nations and the inborn desire to attend to herself and to look good, but to help you not just focus on a tempting appearance please also consider the personal qualities of a lady. There are a lot of good looking and nice ladies in the profiles and that one of these women may become the One for you, even though they do not have a model appearance. We often have questions from men how it is possible that top ladies are still available and looking for a man. Taking into account the number of letters they receive, they should have been married already. The reason may be that they are pickier and have higher demands. So don't get caught in an endless loop of the good looks only, search for a person.
You should also take into account the age of a woman and the age of a partner she is looking for. We strongly advice ladies to approach this issue thoughtfully. It would be strange if a 23 year -old lady would be looking for a 55-year old man. This is not a regular thing either in this country or abroad. Even though a certain age difference is preferable for a Russian woman, it has to be reasonable. You should also be aware why you are looking for a partner much younger then yourself and how this will affect your relationship in future.
To have a harmonious relationship you should pay attention to any gaps in education and social status.
The place of living, a life style, interests and goals should be similar. It is not that common when a person from a very large city would feel comfortable in a rural town or village and vice a versa.
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Language
Language is one of the most important aspects to consider. Not all Russian women know a foreign language when they start looking for a western partner and register with an agency. The agency is of help at the initial stage. But when you develop the relationship and have serious plans for future, it is important for the woman to start learning your language. She should be motivated herself as this is the 1st barrier she will have to overcome to feel comfortable in the relationships and in the country she is going to move to. It would be strange if your Russian partner was not eager to do this
The most important thing to realize is to what extent the expectations of your Russian bride matches yours. Many things like family values, responsibilities, financial aspects, having children, woman's employment, in-laws, children should be discussed. We would try to highlight some of them so that you have a better understanding of your Russian bride and can avoid any potential problems you may have.
Finances
Finances can be an issue your Russian bride and you may have different viewpoints about this subject. In this country people are only just learning to take loans and credit and in general they have serious attitude towards finances in everyday life. This can be explained by the political and economical changes experienced not so long ago. Russian people are not used to speaking much about loans, expenses, bills, etc. That is why it may affect your Russian bride negatively when you speak a lot about this, emphasizing how expensive life is. However you should discuss money issues and find out the attitude of your future partner to earning, spending, saving, investments.
Even though the situation is changing in modern families the traditional approach is when spouses have the same bank account and expenses are common. Your Russian bride would expect you to be the main provider in a family and support her and children financially, at least in the beginning until she adapts in a foreign country and starts working. You should also take keep in mind that her parents, who stay in her home country, may be retired and she will have to help them financially. And this will be your expense item until she makes a living herself.
Family traditions, children and in-laws
Russian people tend to be close to their parents and you should be ready that your Russian wife will want to communicate with her parents on regular basis and help them financially. She will certainly want to visit home once in a while and have her parents come to visit you. This should also be discussed so that you do not have misunderstanding in future. If some of you or both have children from a previous marriage, you should talk in advance what status a child coming to your country will have and all the legal questions connected with this. If your own children live with you or visit you, your future wife has to be informed about this, their attitude to your marriage and what role she is expected to play in their lives. If you plan to have common children, the language (s) they should speak the culture they should learn is also a common decision of international spouses.
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Work and education in a foreign country
It will be up to you and your Russian wife to decide about her employment when she moves to your country. It is good to discuss this in advance as you may think your future wife will be an equal partner sharing all the expenses and paying bills together when she adapts and finds work, whereas she might expect to become a housewife, bring up kids and make a career of being a wife and/or mother. On the contrary you may want to have a dependant wife staying at home and providing a comfortable atmosphere, but your Russian wife maybe looking for professional development and a social life. Thus both of you will experience a potential conflict of interests. You should know that when a Russian woman moves to your country, where educational standards and job requirements are different she will most likely have to retrain or confirm her education to the standards in your country, take courses, or enter a university to get a good job and you will be the only one to help her both financially and emotionally. A Russian lawyer or doctor will hardly become a lawyer in a western country soon. And a person having professional life in Russia may look forward to having the same thing in her new country. So the difficulties and expenses involved have to be well considered.
Information
Unfortunately your Russian bride will not be particularly well-informed about your country’s legal system, banking, traditions, life style, citizenship, and social standards, etc. It would be a great deal of help if you help in providing some real information, speak about the legal status she and her children will have when they come to live in your country, what rights and obligations she will have what she will have to learn. This will help both of you develop trust relationship, make her understand more about the place she is going to live in and help you both make an educated decision.
The general recommendation is to ask a Russian woman, you are planning to marry, more questions, try to come and visit her in her home city, get acquainted with her parents and friends, see the environment she lives in, learn the things she is used to. Pay attention to what she says about her family, if she feels comfortable in her home country. A person feeling unhappy about everything and criticizing everything, will most likely be unhappy in any country with any partner.
We wish you luck in your search of your charming Russian bride and a happy family life. We hope these recommendations will help you to avoid the potential pit falls, you may not be aware of.
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Why Russian women are looking for a partner abroad
The phenomenon of the international marriage between a western men and a Russian / Ukrainian woman has gained so much popularity that this phenomenon can attract the attention of people not involved in such a process. We would try to analyze this phenomenon from economical, social, psychological, demographic view points and find out what motivates Russian women to leave their country and look for a spouse abroad.
We cannot claim to present any scientific research or write a thesis. Besides, any generalization has little truth in it. This is why this article is just opinions based on our experiences in the dating industry. Having lots of female friends looking for a foreign spouse, personally trying this, collecting public opinion, having some general observations in these countries and studying what mass media and the internet presents about this topic.
One more important thing should be said that not ALL unmarried Russian women are looking for a western husband. The majority are more or less happily married to local men as everywhere else in the world. A lot do not believe this will ever work out due to the mentality and cultural differences, others are simply fearful of getting into a poor dependent position in foreign countries, some will never leave their families, etc. In general, there can be quite a few reasons against this line of pursuit.
The economical aspect would be the most significant factor in favor of marrying a foreigner. Many countries of the former Soviet Union split now are experiencing economical difficulties and the life standard of average citizens is quite low. This is further aggravated by political instability and uncertainty in the future. The society has split into classes with increasing gap in between. People can work really quite for very little income in return. Such situations have affected the image and a position of Russian men. Being a family provider can be scary and some Russian men are scared to start a family and take on such a responsibility. They will sometimes think twice before having children. Sometimes Russian women appear to adapt to the new economical situation a little better and work as much as men and at times make more money. Private apartments are incredibly expensive and not many can afford to take a bank loan. It does not mean the country is doomed to poverty, but the current hardship makes a woman seek stability, better economical conditions for her future family and children, some confidence in the future and perspectives. There is a misconception among many western men about the financial aspect of relationship with a Russian woman and about her expectations. Especially when many write they do not want gold diggers.
When a woman states in her profile that she "is looking for a financial security" this means it's very important for her to know that her future husband has a stable secure job and can provide for the family and for everything necessary for life. Many women work and would like to continue work in a foreign country, many are very successful, but none the less it is still essential for a woman can to rely on her partner, and particularly so when she gives birth to a child.. So she will invariably want to be with a responsible man in a safe and secure place to raise children.
As a part of security for a woman and her future children come social life and aids granted by the government. Unfortunately in Russia, Ukraine and Belarus, the law does defend a woman when she gets a divorce. Nominally she is granted 25% of her ex-husband's income as the alimony for their children. The question of custody is rarely discussed and a child almost always remains with the mother. And in fact not many ex-husbands care about their children; the figures in the financial documents are faked or "fathers" even disappear. Helping children becomes a personal choice not the moral duty or the necessity demanded in the society.
Another even more important factor in favor of seeking a foreign husband is demographical situation.
Statistic rates give different figures, but in general the percentage of men and women in Russia is 46 to 54 correspondingly in Ukraine it is 44 to 55.
In some areas the figures are even more pessimistic the ratio of men to women makes one to 3.
Apart from this sociologists draw attention to a characteristic feature of Russia - a 12 years gap between life span of men and women. This appears unique in the world demographic situation.
Average life span of men make 58.5 years, as for women , it is 71.9 years. Specialists explain this as a result of poor economy, living under pressure and hard work. Whatever the reasons are the demographic situation is against women and makes them widen their search and consider marrying a man form another country.
The question Why Russian women are looking for partner abroad should be asked together with "Why Russian women are using the service of introduction or marriage agencies". We will not write about how hard it can be to find a potential partner, especially after a certain age. It is interesting that even using world web it is easier to get in touch with a foreigner interested in relationship then a fellow country man. It is not a usual thing to meet through a local marriage agencies and an average Russian man is very cautions about a woman's intentions to get married. In other words marriage is what scares men off here. When a woman applies to a dating agency, especially an international one, she experiences attention from men that are interested in CREATING A FAMILY and long term relationship and they clearly declare this. (We hope all the intentions are true).
Another aspect is a family role a woman has played in most Eastern European countries for generations. Traditionally Russia and Ukraine are patriarchal countries, with distinct gender roles both for men and women. It is changing now, but still the background and family upbringing play a considerable role.
In 90 cases out of 100 even a very successful and a woman of substance will sacrifice her career and personal interests for the sake of family and children. Even though young ladies are quite independent now and very career oriented, especially in big cities, family and having children remains the main life mission of a woman as she has been taught by her mother.
The majority of families are traditional and a girl from the early age is taught that the she will be responsible for keeping peace and comfort in her family and has to learn patience and respect her husband. This is what probably makes Russian wives so attractive. There is hardly a woman that can be comfortably single or divorced, even though she does not mind this. The public pressure is still quite tough, consciously or not a Russian woman aims at marriage and family.
There are some more pros for looking a western husband from the side of A Russian woman. Some general complains on a Russian spouse and comparisons would be that.
- Western men help more about the house and generally do not load woman along with all the household duties and cares about the child. They are more used to it and take day to day responsibilities matter-of-factly. On the contrary the majority of Russian men think household duties are what a woman has to do even though she has a full time job.
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Western men show more respect and appreciation to women; they care and court more and value woman's opinions and decisions.
- Western men in general drink and smoke less. This can be explained by the years of state policy again smoking and limitation of drinking in public places, but the result is what matters. Many Russian men drink and this turns a family life into hell.
- Western men care about family and children, invest more time and efforts into the children's upbringing and do it more willingly.
One should also take into account the fact that many Russian women looking for a western partner have never been abroad and never lived in a foreign countries and they may idealize life there and a potential foreign husband. The romantic search of something new and imagining a Prince Charming speaking a foreign language may affect a woman's decision to take this endeavor.
To sum it up we should say that there may be a combination of different reasons why Russian woman are looking for western partners, but the main one still remains searching for love, understanding, happy relationship.
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